Since I've never been independently wealthy before I didn't know what to do. So I went to a nicer bar than the one last night. We're all spinning on a rock going around a giant fireball, might as well drink the time away.
The nicer bar had nicer scenery. I could actually see myself getting rejected in this place. But the bartender was paid to be nice to me so she had to ask what I wanted and call me sweetie. I said what do people normally drink here at 3 in the afternoon and she made me something that tasted sugary and expensive. Just what I wanted.
I started looking around for maybe a crying girl, or a group of girls with a self conscious friend but no luck. I did see a guy in a suit though. He made eye contact, and I could feel it in my chest. It was like when something went down the wrong pipe.
He motioned for me to come over and I pretended he was looking at someone else. By the time I had faced straight ahead he was walking over to sit next to me.
"Hey there buddy. I'm sorry to bother you but I've got a question. And it's going to sound odd."
"No go right ahead." I'll answer any question when the person asking leans forward and shows off a gun underneath their jacket. I'm not afraid of getting shot in the middle of the day in a bar, I just think that's a pretty good power move. I mean I don't know why he's threatening me.
"Where do you work?"
Oh shit, that's all? "I actually can't remember the name of it. Cheers, by the way. They uh"
"They'll do anything."
"Yep. That's the place."
"Good, good. I'd heard rumors about the place. Just wanted to make sure it was true. Hey let me get your next round."
He signaled to the bartender, finished his drink and walked out. Another power play. This guy's full of them. I finished my drink and before I could decide what to get for the second one, a girl came and sat next to me. I was shocked too.
There was something off about her though. She looked like she could've been related to the bartender, but that wasn't it. She looked like she'd been made to look like someone else.
"You're going to want an old fashioned."
"And why's that?"
"Because that's what guys are usually drinking when they get me to go home with them."
Ok. In retrospect, I should have picked up on a few things. Who says that? What's an old fashioned? And who's trying to go home with someone at 5:00? But blood flow to my brain was a little light, so my response was:
"Afternoon?"
I don't think she worried if I was single after that. I have no idea how old she was. She could have been 22 or 35. But she touched my arm and ordered two old fashioneds so she was however old she wanted to be.
I truly believe the human race could never die out. Men are too dumb to let it. She called us a taxi after we finished our 4th drinks. I think she paid. She hugged the bartender and I felt a surprising pang of jealousy. The cab pulled up and we piled in. The driver turned to ask where we were going but he stopped mid sentence.
It was a blur, but he started yelling at the girl to get out. She acted confused, but she wasn't as convincing as me. Then the driver started yelling in a different language. She conceded and I must have nodded off. The driver woke me up outside of my apartment. He didn't take any payment but I was too asleep to notice. I passed out near my couch.
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